Goodbye…for now!

This marks my very last blog of the semester. How crazy is that? I want to take this time to reflect on what I’ve learned in the past four months.

I am valuable and worthy of respect

I can’t count the number of times I’ve been insulted, disrespected, and degraded. Starting a new major as an upperclassman is hard. Other upperclassmen automatically treat me as inferior. This is really frustrating because I know I have a lot of potential and just need someone to give me constructive criticism and treat me like I have worth – but instead I’m beaten down and feel like I’m not doing anything right.

This semester I have realized that I do not have to suck up to my peers in order to be liked. If they won’t treat me with respect, I won’t be friends with them. I am not a hateful person and I don’t snap at others, so I don’t see why I attract people that are. It’s odd, actually.

I will not be hateful. I will not snap. I will not avoid.

I will be kind. I will keep my distance. I will be mature.

What I have to say matters. And I am not stupid.

I will never live up to my sister’s standards

My sister double majored and graduated with a 3.9, in four years. Four years. One of her majors was flute performance. A music degree in and of itself usually takes five years to complete! Not only that, but she also was the president of the music sorority and had a job. She’s incredible. She’s always been this way! She has great work ethic, is a great test taker, and knows how to balance her life. (I’m sure she’d disagree though)

This semester, my goal was a 3.9. I essentially wanted to be like my sister. While there’s nothing wrong with my sister being my role model, I obsessed over it. I dug myself into the ground because I was working so hard. I had horrible bags under my eyes, I never was fully focused, and I was constantly on the go. It was unhealthy! I had my ideal GPA, but I was miserable.

Not only did I start to figure out a study habit that worked for me, but I also gained a whole new respect for my incredible sister! I’m still working hard, but I eased up a bit and will happily be ending the semester with a 3.59.

I don’t know anything about photography

This semester kicked me in the butt! I’ve been taking photos since I was 11 and I have improved quite a bit, but I’m not as good as my mind thought I was. I took a photography class and learned all of the logistics and specifics and was humbled.

I’ll admit it (and I’m really ashamed of it), this whole semester I found myself better than others in my class. There. I said it. Jeez, I’m awful. Because here’s the deal. I’M NOT. We all are struggling to figure out what exactly the art of photography is!

Through the countless photoshoots I’ve had the honor of taking, I have found at least 5 things in each that I could have done differently. Because of this class, I am constantly aware of my imperfections. And this is good. I am taking two steps forward, but falling a step back each time. And this is good. I am constantly improving. And this is great.

Four years ago vs. now

Four years ago vs. now

I’m loving these revelations and changes that have come to be this semester. And I’m excited to embark on more mind-altering journeys in 2015.

Until next semester (in Intro to Multimedia),

Claudia

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About chall29

Photographer from Northwest Arkansas pursuing degrees in Print Journalism and Speech Communication at Arkansas Tech University.
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